How are Eye Contact and Autism Related?

Autism is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects social interaction, communication, and behavior. One of the earliest signs of autism in children is limited eye contact, and many professionals list this as a key indicator when diagnosing young children.

However, while a lack of eye contact is often seen in autistic children, many autistic adults seem to have no trouble making eye contact. So, why is there a difference? The answer lies in masking—a learned behavior that helps autistic individuals navigate social expectations.

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Why Eye Contact is Considered an Early Sign of Autism

Eye contact is not something babies instinctively know how to do. Neurotypical children learn its importance over time by observing and interacting with others. They naturally develop the habit of looking into someone’s eyes when speaking, listening, or expressing emotions.

Autistic children, however, do not automatically develop this skill in the same way. They may not use eye contact to communicate their needs or emotions. Instead, they might:

• Look away when speaking or listening
• Avoid direct eye contact in social situations
• Struggle to use facial expressions as social cues

For many years, this difference has been used as a red flag for early autism diagnosis.

Why Do Many Autistic Adults Make Eye Contact?

While autistic children may avoid eye contact, many autistic adults appear to make normal or even intense eye contact. This can lead to confusion, with some professionals mistakenly believing that an individual cannot be autistic because they maintain eye contact.

The reason behind this is masking—a coping strategy where autistic individuals learn to mimic neurotypical behaviors to fit in.

Some autistic adults have shared that:

• They were taught or forced to make eye contact as children.
• They believed avoiding eye contact would make them seem dishonest or rude.
• They developed intense, prolonged eye contact to compensate, sometimes making interactions uncomfortable.

Does Eye Contact Mean Someone is Not Autistic?

No. The ability to make eye contact does not mean someone is not autistic.

For many autistic adults, eye contact feels unnatural or uncomfortable, even if they have learned to do it. The experience can vary from:

• Mild discomfort—requiring conscious effort to maintain eye contact.
• Severe discomfort—feeling exposed or vulnerable while making eye contact.
• Complete avoidance—choosing not to mask and prioritizing comfort over social expectations.

For some autistic people, masking becomes so internalized that they don’t even realize they are doing it. Others, especially those who have accepted their diagnosis and are actively unmasking, may choose not to make eye contact—and that is completely okay.

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Should We Expect Eye Contact in Autism Therapy?

Because eye contact can be so uncomfortable for autistic individuals, there is a growing shift in therapy approaches. Many providers now understand that forcing eye contact is not necessary for effective communication.

Instead, therapies are focusing on:

• Encouraging comfortable forms of communication.
• Respecting an individual’s boundaries.
• Recognizing that eye contact is not required for meaningful interactions.

FAQs About Eye Contact and Autism

1. Why do some autistic adults make eye contact while others avoid it?

Some autistic individuals have learned to make eye contact through masking or social conditioning, while others choose to prioritize their comfort by avoiding it.

2. Does making eye contact mean a person is not autistic?

No. Many autistic people can force themselves to make eye contact, but that does not mean it comes naturally or feels comfortable for them.

3. Should autistic children be trained to make eye contact?

Instead of forcing eye contact, it’s better to teach alternative ways of engagement, such as focusing on body language, tone of voice, and other non-verbal communication skills.

4. How can I communicate effectively with an autistic person who avoids eye contact?

Allow them to communicate in ways that feel natural to them—whether through writing, gestures, or simply talking without direct eye contact.

Final Thoughts

Eye contact is often misunderstood when it comes to autism. While it is commonly seen as a diagnostic sign in children, many autistic adults have learned to mask this trait to fit in with societal expectations. However, forcing or expecting eye contact can be uncomfortable and unnecessary for communication.

If you or someone you know is struggling with understanding autism and social interactions, seeking professional guidance can help.